Why do we keep a diary?
In hoping we will be able to confide everything in a paper, as we have never been able to confide in anyone, and hope that this will be a great source of comfort and support.
We can shake off everything we write. Our sorrows disappear, our courage is reborn. We have a lot of opinions even if we don’t say them out loud. And we shouldn’t prevent people from speaking, no matter how young they are.
Paper has more patience than people. It will never judge you. I don’t have a friend. Of course, no one will believe me. I am sociable and charismatic, at least I pretend to be sometimes when the situation calls on it. On the surface, I seem to have everything, except a one true loyal friend. My friends and I aren’t getting closer, that’s the problem. Maybe it’s my fault that we don’t confide in each other. Or maybe that’s their fault preferring to hang out more with some people over me. Regardless, that’s just how things are.
Darlene really left a hole in me. There was a time that she was that one friend but I don’t think things will go back anymore. It doesn’t feel like it. As long as she’s not going insane, and is getting better I guess I’ll just have to be contented and accept that I lost a one good friend who understands me and keeps me grounded.
I don’t want to have lived a wasted life like most people. I want to be useful or bring a joy or something to the people, even the people I’ve never met. I want to have a legacy. I don’t wanna be forgotten. I want to keep on living even though I am dead.